Act Of Depression

(Album: Act Of Depression - 1999)

("All I ever wanted was someone to love me")
I tried to cry out from the inside, but I guess my soul did not pour itself out enough
Blood on the walls, flaming black, blood on the walls
I saw you staring through the cracks
No one was to know what was happening in me I felt no love
I felt no reason to carry on with my life
Everything was wrong, nothing was right, at least that is what I thought
Kids finding laughter at my expense
They were killing me on the inside they couldn't give up their pride
My heart was bleeding from so much grieving
On the outside I looked fine, you couldn't tell but on the inside was eternal hell
I got caught up in the moment of depression
And before I knew it my body was lying on the ground
With a gun in my hand my hourglass was out of sand
Thanks to all the people who drove me to death
Without you I could have never ended my breath
Through your anger and hate, I was able to choose my fate
There was a way out, but I chose the easy route
Blast of a gun, breath runs out, final thoughts put to extinction
"No more love, no more pain," for you have chosen suicide as the way out
Help them
Ice-cold fingers, body lays on the floor
Pool of blood you see, you scream out in terror
Her body is now a part of mutilation, her soul the victim of strangulation
I will not accept this evil anymore
I never thought of who I hurt or I never tried to look for the good
I'm sorry for whoever I hurt, it's not easy to look back on my life
And know I did not know Christ
For now I live in a real hell
I wish I had another chance... then I would live my life with love