My Dad Says That's For Pussies

(Album: Hard-Off - 2015)

Fuck Guns 'N' Roses without Slash
A real man never uses hair product unless he's black
Toilet Paper is for queers
Gargling after a blowjob is how they make light beer

You can't have no fun with an unloaded gun
My Dad says that's for pussies

Ain't gonna lift the seat to whizz
Just 'cos it's called Men's Gymnastics doesn't mean it is
This Fairtrade coffee tastes like gay
Now seems like a good time to out Matthew McConaughey

You can't have no fun with an unloaded gun
My Dad says that's for pussies

Libraries, back-up parachutes and the Versailles Treaty
Seatbelts, hurricane warnings and anti-freeze
Rogaine, helmets, CPR and Kenny G
Wheelchairs, Ghandi, rehab, braille and harmonies

John Wayne would never use a surge protector!

You can't have no fun with an unloaded gun
My Dad says that's for pussies
[x2]

You can't have no fun with an unloaded gun
My Dad says, my Dad says
My Dad says that's for pussies