My Kind Of Bitch

(Album: Tunnel Of Love - 1996)

My kind of bitch ain't like your bitch
Cuz my bitch don't bitch at all
My bitch don't blink, she don't even think
About money or fuckin mall

My kind of bitch don't fix her hair
She don't care about what she wears
Cuz she's much too busy pulling the worms
Out her butt, she ain't bathed in years

My kind of bitch, I'll never forget
We forced met on a Oujia board
Miss Crabber Damned, she would chew on snakes
And swallow a ninja sword

I said, "hey bitch, how do you do?
Some fucks call me Violent J"
She picked her nose and flicked it at me
Smiled and was on her way, my kind of bitch

My kind of bitch
My kind of bitch don't fix her hair
She don't care about what she wears
My kind of bitch don't fix her hair
She don't care about what she wears
Fuck that!

My kind of bitch has a hole in her neck
And has to talk like this "I love you"
She can drink through it, ya get used to it
It whistle every time we kiss

My kind of bitch gots one good tittie
The other one's skinny and red
She can make the one jiggle
The other one don't do shit but just sit their dead

My kind of bitch has a wooden eye
With a nail sticking half way out
It once caught a fire and we all had to spit
In her face just to put it out

My kind of bitch is a little loopy
And her ass might droop a bit
But I scoop that loop and fold the flop
And I fuck that pile of shit, my kind of bitch

My kind of bitch
My kind of bitch gots one good tittie
The other one's skinny and red
My kind of bitch gots one good tittie

"Hello? Um, my name is J. I'm from Detroit. I'm looking for a girl,
who's, um, dead. Um, a girl who can possibly forfill some of my
fetishes. Which include, um, dipping your titties in Faygo and
slapping my face with them. Um, jumping from the dresser and landing
on my balls. Uh..."

My kind of bitch waits till I sleep
Then run and fuck my friends
And everytime I break her legs
Then give my homie's ends (haha what's up, man!)

She shot me once and stabbed my neck
And even broke my nose
But I lick her from her crooked neck
Down to her stringy toes, my kind of bitch

My kind of bitch
My kind of bitch waits till I sleep
Then run and fuck my friend
My kind of bitch waits till I sleep then...

"Hello? Uh, my name is Shaggs, and I'm lookin for a girl with a
big big fat fuckin ass. And titties. And a big fat fuckin ass.
And, uh, I want my dick sucked, and I want my balls scratched.
And I want her to scratch my ass and twist my balls at the same
time, that's a must. And I'm looking for a girl who can stretch
titties and stuff em in her ass."

Fuck yeah, motherfucker
I'm looking for a bitch
I'm looking for a girl to fit my needs (my kind of bitch)

We can have picnics under the moon
In the graveyard
We can have picnics under my house (my kind of bitch)

I'm looking for a girl to die with
If you're already dead, that's cool
You can sit around and wait for me to die (my kind of bitch)

I'm looking for a girl to squeeze me
I'm looking for a girl to squeeze my balls
Let me squeeze your neck

"This is Lisa. I've been a bad, bad girl."