If I Died Tonight

(album: Low Expectations - 2021)

And if I die tonight how would I be remembered
As a man that disconnects from the pain that still lingers
It's in the past now yeah that's where I'm found
My future isn't something that I want it passed down
I put up my walls
I keep up my guard
Growing up, everybody says they want to go far
Yeah, then their dreams aren't enough
Yeah, they were stolen by a demon yo that demon is us
People all around me are making mistakes
But they take no blame, they said that it's just fate
I see a smile that's fake
They had a full tank of gas
And then they slammed on the brakes
And that
Yeah, that makes me feel out of place
They call me crazy
Cause I don't feel the need to relate
Take all that baggage
Yeah they just transfer the weight
Just cause you pawned of all your problems
Doesn't mean your life's great

Take a good look around
Look at the people right now
That are holding you down
Would you still be fine?
Yeah, if they weren't around
They may not always be
Just be honest please, are you happy?
Yeah, are you happy?

And these are just the things I believe
I think before you plant your flowers, the grass should be green
I think we move too quickly trying to find what life means
And we start skipping through chapters and we don't play out the scenes
So focused on what we're not
Take the opinions of others
And we start changing the plot
It's all about what you want
It's not about what they got
You live your life around them you won't amount to a lot
I treat relationships, just like the moon
No matter how far or close I know I'm never consumed
And everybody's fitting in they just play it cool
I'd rather be the one out here who's breaking rules
I stay consistent I make moves that are subtle
I swear to God, everybody wants to see you struggle
So they can meet you at the bottom
They've been there for years
They feel better about themselves when you become their peer
But me, naw
I can't give into pressure cause when I do
That's when I slip into depression
And every time I open my heart, it leads to deception
So if I rush to commitment then I ain't learning my lessons
Know that's a strange view
But pain just hits a little different when it's pain you choose
I know you settled, go do what you do
But I'll be out here making music I got so much to prove