Outta My Mind

(album: Scared Of Heights - 2021)

I've been putting up with my
My shit and saying I've changed, I don't
Buy it, but you fool me twice and I like it, I like it
There is more than one way outta my mind

Room full of people used to be so loud
But I got chewed up and spit back out
No self-doubt clouds me until I'm part of the crowd
I used to fly, now I tie myself down
Asking why it never used to matter
They would do whatever, and then I would do the latter
We would be together, but all we had was laughter
And now we never talk because I never learned what's after
I'm sorry if I disappeared, I thought I could get better
The real me fucking loved you, and I wish you woulda met her
But I didn't wanna call 'cause everything was on the parts
Nothing's ever perfect, so I guess I'll never start
I turned 30, and it's hard, I feel 16 in my heart
I picked up a camera 'cause the sadness in my bars
Started making me depressed like I was cutting open scars
I decided I was darkness, that I'm not a fucking star
Sometimes I play guitar, sometimes I play piano
Sometimes I make a beat, sometimes I dislike candles
But all the time I think that I should probably get some help
Before I waste the life that I been turning into hell
I don't see my future, I just see my failures
Smoke another cigarette and smile at my neighbours
Make another coffee, try to pass time
There's more than one way outta my mind
There's more than one way

There's more than one way outta my mind
There's the fun way or I can take my time

We used to be so effervescing
Now I'm fucking depressing
I should go before you notice me
One day I'll be convalescing
But for now I'm a mess and
I should know so much better, so much better, yeah

There's more than one way outta my mind
There's the fun way or I can take my time