Quietest Friend

(album: Phoenix - 2019)

Staving off rejection, which always hurt like hell
I took the devil's bargain, made a stranger of myself
If anything was wrong, I couldn't tell
So I didn't see it coming but now it's pretty clear
I traded my own wisdom for a jury of my peers
I ignored you for thirty years

You don't have to tell me
How hard it must have been
For you to let me in
Nothing lasts forever
Now I understand
I hurt you again
My quietest friend

Fifth grade in the lunchroom, fickle friends were telling jokes
Making you the punchline of some random thing I wrote
They were looking to me to land the final blow
Just to be included, went straight up to my head
I thought the joke too stupid for it to matter what I said
I was wrong but I went along with it

You don't have to tell me
How hard it must have been
For you to let me in
Nothing lasts forever
Now I understand
I hurt you again
My quietest friend

We could write me some reminders
I'd memorize them
I could sing them to myself
And whoever's listening
I could put them on a record
About my hometown
Sitting here with pen and paper
I'm listening now