I'm Different Now

(album: Lanterns - 2023)

I intellectualize my feelings
Then I get high to drown them out
I know the hurt is part of healing
Wish you were here to hold me now

All I can feel is your indifference
Back then I thought that I deserved it
There's nothing I could do to fix it
I guess I'm still learning how to live with it

If I was still an optimist
I would just move on from this
But I, I'm different now
Forgave your broken promises
Yeah, I loved you though all of it
But I, I'm different now
Oh, I hope one day I'll love again another away
Cuz I, I'm different now

Drove by your house again last weekend
Remember when it felt like home
I think a part of me's still in there
Do you ever feel my ghost?

I only see you in my nightmares
Sometimes I wish that I could haunt you
What if I'm always gonna be scared
What if I'm always gonna want you

If I was still an optimist
I would just move on from this
But I, I'm different now
Forgave your broken promises
Yeah, I loved you though all of it
But I, I'm different now
Oh, I hope one day I'll love again another away
Cuz I, I'm different now

I'm sorry that I wasn't older
Were we ever really friends?
I think I'm finally glad it's over
It still hurts but it hurts less

If I was still an optimist
I would just move on from this
But I, I'm different now
Forgave your broken promises
Yeah, I loved you though all of it
But I, I'm different now
Oh, I hope one day I'll love again another away
Cuz I, I'm different now
Oh, I hope one day I'll love again another away
Cuz I, I'm different now