21 Things I'd Rather Do Than Smoke

(album: Shut Up! And Listen - 2015)

You ready to do this, I-Dawg?
You know it, A-Dizzle. I'm ready for some hardcore rapping!
All right, let's do this!
Yeah, here we go!

Hey yo!
We gotta go and tell you 21 things we'd rather do
If someone offers you tobacco
Say you got other things you'd rather go do.

Like being in the snow without wearing coats.
Then sail in a lake with a hole-filled boat.
Have a very dangerous encounter with a very mean goat.
That's what we'd rather do than use tobacco.

We'd rather eat a banana with the peel on.
Only wear socks and walk on a wet lawn.
Have my 16th birthday on Christmas.
Take a shower in soup.

Hey yo!
We gotta go and tell you 21 things we'd rather do
If someone offers you tobacco
Say you got other things you'd rather go do.

We'd rather move to the moon and be a sad, lonely guy.
Live in a house without working Wi-Fi
Scuba dive with some, some sharks.
Get dressed in the, the dark.
Give up sweet treats and only eat bark.
Cut off our hair with an aluminum can.
Get a massage by a rough handed man.

Hey yo!
We gotta go and tell you 21 things we'd rather do
If someone offers you tobacco
Say you got other things you'd rather go do.

We'd rather carpool in the car with only screaming babies.
Pour salt on a cut and rub in some rabies.
Brush my hair with a fork.
Dump milk on my shorts.
Sign up to teach old folks to twerk.
Drink a whole can of soda that was all flat.
Go to a dog park but dressed as a cat
Now lets slow it down for a heart-to-heart chat.

Here comes the sad part and it's about to get real.
So get out your hearts and prepare for the feels.
We know our rhymes are hardcore.
We hope the message isn't lost.
When it comes to smoking, you need to know the real cost.
So you gotta find someone close to you.
And tell 'em 21 things you'd rather do.

Hey yo!
We gotta go and tell you 21 things we'd rather do
If someone offers you tobacco
Say you got other things you'd rather go do.