Waffle Woman

(album: Episode XIII - 2019)

At breakfast in Belgium
On our honeymoon
She says I'm popping out for shopping
I'll be back soon

Where the 'eck have you been
I guessed where she'd gone
She burped and cried as she denied
Her waffle addiction

I, I, I wed a roly poly
I, I, I wed a roly poly

Waffle woman, what a sight
Where did you get that appetite
Waffle scoffing, scoffing waffles night and day
She was such a shapely spouse
Until she hit that waffle house
Her belly burst and blew her blouse away
Waffle, waffles, waffles

One waffle week later
She's in for a shock
She's a pig, buttocks so big
They won't fit in her frock
She resembled Kate Moss
Slim and trim, skinny
She became fatty bum bum
She's two tonne Tessie

I, I, I wed a roly poly
I, I, I wed a roly poly

There's no need to fret
She said don't forget
When I get on me crash diet

No more

Waffle, recipes
It's low calories for me

In a Belgian bistro
We bid out fond farewells
She got so wide
She's stuck inside
Abandoned in Brussels

I, I, I wed a roly poly
I, I, I wed a roly poly