Where Are You Now?

(album: Sonder - 2022)

You proudly carried your conditions like a cross
I calculated my position and went along
One night turned to one week turned to one year
Wrong side of the right life, but I'm right here

We were nineteen, you were nervous
Tracing butterflies on the curtains
Coming up with what you gonna say
'Cause he always calls late and you knew you couldn't hurt him
So tell me how was I supposed to feel?
How was I supposed to heal?
To hell with your closure

But I still want mine

Where are you now?
Are you shaking, love? Are you faking a smile?
Where are you now?
I'm breaking down, but I'm gaining ground, yeah

I was treating my heart like you treat a burn (hold on a second)
Taking every bit of bad advice I'd ever heard
One night turned to one bride, what an affair
You lied and tried to hide your colors from your cousin while she dyed your hair

Well, you got me there

Where are you now?
Are you shaking, love? Are you faking a smile?
Where are you now?
I'm breaking down, but I'm gaining ground, yeah

We were twenty-three, I was nervous
Tracing butterflies on the curtains
Thinking how there's gonna come a day
When I finally take his name
And I know I don't deserve it

We were nineteen, was it worth it?
We were nineteen, was it worth it?

Where are you now?
Are you shaking, love?
Are you faking a smile?
Where are you now?
I'm breaking down, but I'm gaining ground, yeah
I'm breaking down