Note To Self

(album: Soul Therapy - 2021)

How do I start? Maybe just from the heart (Uh)
I know your name Biz, right now I'm talking to Mark (Yeah)
Your therapist told me I should be a little nicer to you (Hmm)
Then maybe it's time I try speaking life into you (Alright)
But if I'm honest, that's where I start to draw a blank (Pssh)
It's crazy, it's like the good is more hard to say
Why is affirming you so harder than critiquing you?
And pointing out yo' flaws is much easier for me to do
I don't wanna see you lose, I know other people do (Ooh-ooh)
Last thing you needed was for me to be mistreating you
Judging you for every little thing you do
Minimize your wins, maximize your L's thinking I was teaching you
Is it that I set the bar way too high to reach for you?
God said to be holy, so at least I don't think I do (Mm)
I ain't mean for you to feel defeated when you can't meet it
You gon' make mistakes, that's why it's grace needed

God said I should love you like I love me
But lately I've been my own worst enemy (My own enemy)
I'm my own worst enemy (I'm my own worst enemy)
I'm my own worst
He said I should love you the way I love myself
But what if I don't love me so well? (Don't love me so well)
I don't love me so well (Me so well), mm

God love you, your kids loved you, your wife loved you (For real)
So many people you never met in your life love you (Uh)
And I know that's hard coming from me (I know)
'Cause lately it feel like e'erybody love you but me (Everybody but me)
But please know that you are worthy of the love you received (Oh I)
Your sin don't disqualify you from the love of the King (Oh, oh)
I know you fear the sum of your struggles'll come for your seed
But you a good dad, that's what they'll grow up to repeat
Just try your best to serve Christ and keep loving your queen
Though you may never be as perfect as you wanted to be
You tryna be something that you never grew up wit', it seem
And that ain't easy to do
It's like you killing it and everybody sees it but you
You just check for the flaws (Ooh)
You be receiving the boos, but you reject the applause
It's like the negative is easier for you to receive
And the positive is much harder for you to believe, man

God said I should love you like I love me
But lately I've been my own worst enemy (My own enemy)
I'm my own worst enemy (I'm my own worst enemy)
I'm my own worst
He said I should love you the way I love myself
But what if I don't love me so well? (Don't love me so well)
I don't love me so well (Me so well), mm