I Better Be Good

(album: Zipper Catches Skin - 1982)

If I ain't cool
My daddy gonna send me
To Military School
If I ain't nice
My girlie gonna freeze me
With cold shoulder ice
If I'm real late
My teacher gonna use me
For alligator bait
So, I better be good
I better be good

If I jump on the gas
The cops are gonna jump
All over my back
If I smoke too much
Doctor says he's gonna
Put my lungs in a crutch
If I'm caught without my pants
Consuelo's dad is gonna shoot
Until he sees me dance

So, I better be good
I had better be good
You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
Nice, nice, nice you better be
Nice, nice, nice you better be
Nice, nice, nice Uh, uh, uh, uh
Nice, nice, nice

Nice, nice, nice
Nice, nice, nice
You better be nice tonight

If I spray it on the seat
Lady gonna tie a big knot
In the meat
If I spewey too fast
Lover's gonna stick
My Wrangler in a cast
If zipper grabs skin
I'll know I had it out
When I shoulda kept it in
Ow.

I better be good
I better be good
I better be good
Ooh.

You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
Nice, nice, nice you better be
Nice, nice, nice you better be
Nice, nice, nice Uh, uh, uh, uh
Nice, nice, nice

I'd better be nice tonight yeah
Nice, nice, nice
Nice, nice, nice
Nice, nice, nice