Chaos Again

(album: Epilogues - 2020)

I woke up in the waves in a daze as the tide rose
Tried to swim away I'm afraid
To fall back underneath
The deepest depths where it crept with its eyes closed
Left a secret hex on my head
I'll never breathe again and I know (I know)
It left me there for dead on my own, I'm cold (I'm cold)
Your memory befriended my ghost (my ghost)
Just a delusion from an ending I wrote (I wrote)
The chaos feels like home

I saw your eyes wide open late last night
The ocean floor felt fine
I think it's by design I'm broken down inside
Erosion cuts with time
I know that I said I said there's a light that's up ahead
You said you said if you follow it you're dead
I said I said there's a light that's up ahead
You said you said if you follow it you're dead to me

I swore I saw the coast I was close to the shoreline
Tired and exposed in the cold
It pulled me underneath
And took me down just to drown for the fourth time
Buried underground with your doubts
I'll never leave again and I know (I know)
It left me there to dig my own my grave, my home (my home)
Your memory befriended my ghost (my ghost)
Just a delusion from an ending I wrote (I wrote)
The chaos feels like home

I let this get inside my head
I think it time and time again
In every epilogue I've read
Seems like they never find the end

I saw your eyes wide open late last night
The ocean floor felt fine
I think it's by design I'm broken down inside
Erosion cuts with time
I know that I said I said there's a light that's up ahead
You said you said if you follow it you're dead
I said I said there's a light that's up ahead
You said you said if you follow it you're dead to me

If you follow it you're dead
You said I can see you down there
Heard your voice in my head
Drowned slow but you never found where

I saw your eyes wide open late last night
The ocean floor felt fine
I think it's by design I'm broken down inside
Erosion cuts with time
I know that I said I said there's a light that's up ahead
You said you said if you follow it you're dead
I said I said there's a light that's up ahead
You said you said if you follow it you're dead to me

If you follow it you're dead
You said I can see you down there
Heard your voice in my head
Drown slow the chaos feels like home