Resurrect

(album: Epilogues II - 2023)

I used to say all the time
I'd look out for your blindside
You'd drink and drive
Despite the flashing lights that lurked behind
I can't decide
If I'm haunted by hindsight
Or terrified
That my own deception left you to die

I can't repent with time
It kills me inside

There's only so much I can take
I ran out of words to say
Resignation is a different kind of pain
You would disappear for days
And I would be unafraid
Cynicism is easier than dismay

Sixty milligrams were like cyanide seeping into your spine
Faded eyes were afraid to die but then brave inside of your mind's eye
Ashamed that I'd hide behind the borrowed time that you'd find
A brazen light and a blatant lie that you're fine

I used to say all the time
I'd look out for your blindside
You'd drink and drive
Despite the flashing lights that lurked behind
I can't decide
If I'm haunted by hindsight
Or terrified
That my own deception left you to die

I can't repent with time
It kills me inside

There's only so much I could try
When you were resolute inside
And full of narcissistic pride you never heard back then
It crept inside your mind
And I neglected every sign
And then you left before I tried to find the words I meant

Sixty milligrams were like cyanide seeping into your spine
Faded eyes were afraid to die but then brave inside of your mind's eye
Ashamed that I'd hide behind the borrowed time that you'd find
A brazen light and a blatant lie that you're fine

I used to say all the time
I'd look out for your blindside
You'd drink and drive
Despite the flashing lights that lurked behind
I can't decide
If I'm haunted by hindsight
Or terrified
That my own deception left you to die

Die inside my head sometimes
Burdens I can't bear to shoulder
Epilogues I've yet to write
Never could compare to closure

I can't shut my eyes
Left you for dead in the dark
You bled through the tourniquet you tied
It kills me inside

I used to say all the time
I'd look out for your blindside
You'd drink and drive
Despite the flashing lights that lurked behind
I can't decide
If I'm haunted by hindsight
Or terrified
That my own deception left you to die