Asshole

(album: The Marshall Mathers LP 2 - 2013)

[Verse 1:]
Came to the world at a time when in was in need of a villain
An asshole, that role think I succeeded fulfilling
But don't think I ever stopped to think that I was speakin to children
Everything was happening so fast it was like I blinked, sold 3 million
Then it all went blank, all I remember is feeling ridiculous cause I was getting sick of this feeling
Like I'm always under attack, man I coulda' stacked my shit list to the ceiling
Women dishing but really
Thinking if anyone ever talks to one of my little girls like this I would kill him
Guess I'm a little bit of a hypocrite when I'm ripping shit but since when did this many
People ever give a shit what I had to say it's just my opinion
If it contradicts how I'm living put a dick in your rear-end
That's why every time you mention a lyric
I thanked you for it, for drawing more attention toward it
Cause it gave me an enormous platform, I'm flattered you thought I was that important
But you can't ignore the fact that I fought for the respect and battled for it
Mad awards, had GLAAD annoyed atta-boy
They told me to slow down, I'd just zone-out
Good luck trying to convince a blopde, it's like telling Gwen Stefani that she sold out
'Cause I was tryin to leave No Doubt
In anyone's mind one day I'd go down in history think they know now
Because everybody knows

[Chorus Skylar Grey:]
Everybody knows, that you're just an asshole
Everywhere that you go, people want to go home, everyone knows
Everybody knows, so don't pretend to be nice
There's no place you can hide, you are just an asshole
Everyone knows, everyone knows Thanks for the support, asshole [x2]

[Verse 2:]
Quit acting salty, I was counting on you to count me out
Ask Asher Roth when he round about dissed me to shout me out
Thought I was history, well God damn honky that compliment's like back-handing a donkey, good way to get your ass socked in the mouth
Nah, I'm off him, but what the fuck's all this trash talking about?
The fight was fixed, I'm back and you can't stop me you knocked me down
I went down for the count, I fell but the fans caught me and now
You're gonna have to beat the fucking pants off me to take my belt
Word to Pacquiao, momma said there ain't nothin else to talk about
Better go in that ring and knock 'em out, or you better not come out
It's poetry in motion like Freddie Roach when he's quoting
Shake-speare, so what if insults are revolting
Even Helen Keller knows life stinks
You think it's a joke 'till your bullet riddled, but you should give little shit what I think
This whole world is a mess, gotta have a goddamn
Vest on your chest and a Glock just to go watch Batman
Who needs ta test a testicles? Not that man
Half you don't got the guts, intestinal blockage, rest of you got lap bands
Stuck to this motto 'fore they put bath salts in all those
Water bottles in Colorado, so get lost, Waldo my soul's escaping through this asshole that is gaping
A black hole and I'm swallowing this track whole, better pack toilet paper
But I'm taking no crap hoe, here I go down the Bat Pole and I'm changing back into that ole maniac in fact there they go, trying to dip out the back door retreating
'Cause everybody knows

[Chorus]

[Verse 3:]
Holy mackerel. I'm the biggest jerk on the planet Earth I smacked a girl
Off the mechanical bull at a tractor pull
For thinking we had some magnetic pull
Then screamed "ICP in this bitch! how do fucking magnets work? '
'Cause you're attractive but we ain't attractable, hate to be dramatical but I'm not romantical
L'm making up words, so you can understandable
It's tragical, thinking some magical shit's gonna happen, that ain't practical
You cracking
A joke? It's laughable
'Cause me and love's like a bad combination I keep them feelings locked in a vault, so it's safe to say I'm uncrackable
My heart is truly guarded
Full body armor bitch, you just need a helmet 'cause if you think you special, you're retarded
Thinking you're one of a kind like you got some platinum vagina
You're a trainwreck, I gotta one track mind and shorty you're fine but you sorta remind me of a 49'er
'Cause you've been a gold digger since you was a miner
Been trying ta hunt me down like a dog 'cause you're on my ass but you can't get a cent
'Cause all of my spare time's spent
On my nose in this binder, so don't bother trying
Only women that I love are my daughters, but sometimes I rhyme
And it sounds like I forget I'm a father and I push it farther, so Father forgive me if I forget to draw the line
It's apparent I shouldn't have been parent I'll never grow up, so to Hell with your parents and 'mother' fuck 'father' time
It ain't never gonna stop, a pessimist who transformed to an optimist in his prime
So even if I'm half-dead, I'm half alive
Poured my half-empty glass in a cup now my cup has runneth over
And I'm about to set it on you like a muthafucking coaster
L'm going back to what got me here, yeah cocky and
Can't knock being Rudolph, so fear not my deer
And dry up your tear drops I'm here
White America's mirror, so don't feel awkward or weird
If you stare at me and see yourself, 'cause you're one too, shouldn't be a shock be
Cause everybody knows

[Chorus]