Patterns?

(album: I Died For This!? - 2021)

I'm sorry

You took your first steps today
And I was nowhere to be found
Busy keeping my head above water
Until my feet could find the ground
Red flag on my resume
Cause it's the second time around
Too young to know I let you down
Too young to know I let you down

And some days are so much easier than others
So much more about me I needed to discover
But never had the chance (I'm sorry)
This is me saying sorry in advance

I'm just a kid raising some kids
With dreams of making it big
Tryna make a name in this biz
I became a slave in this bitch
Was hoping I could maybe get rich 'cause all I got
Is these words that I jot, I never had a jump shot, I'm not
A scholar, but l learned that the world is turned by a dollar
Whether I wear a mask or shirt with a collar I gotta
Provide but that ain't even the only thing that'll quali
-fy me as being a father, my pops ain't even bother
Left me toggling with toys as a toddler momma, 24 with two kids
What her and Ruth did, was put a roof over our heads
Cause niggas is ruthless
View a newborn as a nuisance
Or a noose that he would lose when
He cut ties with all of his loose ends
And I do spend, a flew blue moon
Wondering where you been
And assessing, and assuming
No aggression, you just human
And a blessing was sent in your direction but you eluded
And neglected, and refuted, that's your lesson, I'm the student
And l used it, to father myself
Now I'm in my second parenthood
Shit, I'm a father myself
Was never a product of wealth or prodigal
I'm a prodigy, came from poverty
Now I'm popping and purchasing property
Reversing curses and pocketing profits
Fulfilling my prophecies
And my kids, they gon' reap the rewards
Far cry from sleeping on floors
Hard times we'd weep and we'd mourn
That's in the archives we seeking reform
I was there on the first day of school
I'll be there at the graduation
Like congratulations and I'm glad you made it
I'ma let 'em know they made their dad elated
I'ma pad the savings, they could blow a milli
If they had the craving
No more being poor and feeling agitated
No one gave it to me shit, I had to take it
I'm that same bastard used to rap in basements
Then I activated, now I get racks to say shit
I'm acclimated, got 'em captivated
Any acts of hatred they just capping ain't it
Had to patent my own patterns
I'm just glad that I didn't take after David
Yeah, I said your name, and you lame
If this end up in court in a affidavit, that's all I got

And some days are so much easier than others
So much more about me I needed to discover
But never had the chance
This is me saying sorry in advance