In Our Haunted House

(album: Halloween Howls - 1996)

Really coming down
All wet man!
Step in some place over here, c'mere
Open the door
All right, no way I'm going in there
I don't care, just open it!
Oh, oh
Let's go in, c'mon man
Okay okay okay
Whoa, look at this place, man! It's cool!
Yeah, yeah, I could like to leave
Looks like a haunted house
Hey, the door!
Uh-oh

Welcome boys! Come right in

Please come in, you're welcome here
Mind the cobwebs and the bones
May we invite you to spend the night?
Make yourself at home

Step this way, here's the living room
Though "dead room" is actually, heh, more correct
'Cause there hasn't been a living soul here
Since Grandpa broke his neck

In our haunted house
We'll treat you like one of us
But in our haunted house
That could be hazardous

Browse around the kitchen
Have a spoon, a fork, a knife
You must excuse those ketchup stains
We ate someone last night

Here is your big bedroom, dears
You'll love the creaky bed
You'll sleep just fine but when you wake
You still may feel half dead

In our haunted house
The butler is a ghost
The upstairs maid's been buried for years
And the chauffeur's comatose

In our haunted house
Our hospitality
Is something of which we're very proud
Oh, do you take poison in your tea?

Don't let the spiderwebs mess up your hair
Don't mind the piano playing with no one there
The crumbling bookshelves covered with dust
One or two headless bodies, what's all the fuss?
The dreadful pounding, the screams and moans
It's just a typical night at home

In our haunted house
Things float through the walls
You might see sights that chill the soul
Be sure to wear a shawl

We'd love you to come in
Stay a while and play
Once you finally settle in
You'll never go away
We'll make sure of that!

In our haunted house
In our haunted house
In our haunted house
In our haunted house

In our haunted house
In our haunted house
In our haunted house
In our haunted house