I'll Keep My Hatchet

(album: The Marvelous Missing Link: Lost - 2015)

We're keeping tables loaded with pistols, military, hunting, laser-optics, and shooting rifles
Sunday morning, the first 50 paying adults will receive a free stainless lock-blade pocketknife
Don't forget to register for the free custom-built AR-15 being given away by the Bridge Town Gun Shop

Keep your AR-15
Trash knife kept clean
Cross hair laser beam on your ruger machine
Keep your 9 milli Luger with that hot ass red dot
I'll keep my hatchet
Swing-and-go chop!

Keep that Colt pipe back
With that big Desert Eagle
That weaponry dagger, carve that ass up-reload
9mili Mac10, that musket rifle that pop!
And I'll keep my hatchet
Swing-and-go chop!

.40 cal Smith & Wesson
That double burst
12 gauge sawed-off
Murder in the first
M60, .44 Magnum, or Glock
I'll keep my hatchet
Swing-and-go chop!

Wessley Richards, drop like a bolt rifle
Mauser! Model 98 make 'em stiffle!
Swiss army knife, Bowie, machette don't stop!
But I'll keep my hatchet!
Swing-and-go-chop!

I don't need technology, it's not a pair 'o me
I don't need artillery to feed the thrill in me
I don't need machinery for the mean in me
I'm kind of a hands-on guy!

(Muggers with shotguns, rifles, handguns, knives of all kinds)

You better
You better
Run from the Baretta
They call it "The-Kill-You-Deatta"
"The Sweater Shredder"!
Some blast through vests when you're busting at cops
But I'll keep my hatchet!
Swing-and-go chop!

Brandish super pose pump-action Mossberg
Modern model .336 will toss nerds
Colt 45 into the chamber, it dropped
But I'll take my hatchet
Swing-and-goes chop!

I don't need technology, it's not a pair 'o me
(I don't need it to get by!)
I don't need artillery to feed the thrill in me
(Cuz I can do it myself!)
I don't need machinery for the mean in me
(It just ain't who I am!)
I'm kind of a hands-on guy!

(Hi. I'm Heather. Come see what I've got)