Panic Attack

(album: Yum Yum Bedlam - 2021)

"Say you're walking down the train tracks. You turn around and there's a train barreling at you, only feet from you. Your brain would then flush a chemical throughout your body of fear and panic. What's happening to you with your panic attacks is at completely random times, your brain is releasing a chemical throughout your body. You're suddenly in a complete state of panic for no apparent reason."

I'm glad I won't be home too late to chill, unwind and marinate
Fix myself a fucking steak, but half-asleep I drop the plate
I'd rather I make that mistake at home than on the interstate
I'm lucky, my fate's been great
I like my job, I'm doing well, it's cool as far as I can tell
Peep Rebecca, thick as hell, we kicked it and she wasn't stale
Took her to the Rusty Nail, I might even score some tail
So far, so smooth, I sail
Thank God for all my given luck, all day long I hear, "What's up?"
I'm never lonely, never stuck, to have nobody care would suck
If no one nowhere gave a fuck, then fuck my life, I'd give it up
I'm loved so I live it up
Shit have things been kinda tight, and for a change it's going right
Been feeling like I'm beaming bright, can even fly and even might
Depression meet my healing light, even demons scream in fright
Think I can reach new heights

Don't go overboard, 'cause you know the world is crazy
Fuck going overboard, it takes everything you got
Never go overboard, you know the fucking world is crazy
Fuck going overboard, no it don't take a lot to make a brain pop
Cooling it, schooling shit
So why the fuck am I having a fucking panic attack?
In a world of human wreckage
I'm maxing, relaxing
Tell me why am I having a fucking panic attack?
In a world of human wreckage

"First of all, keep in mind you're completely stricken with panic and fear, so there isn't much that's going to be very comforting to you. However, there are techniques, if you can remember to try to use them during a moment of utter chaos in your brain. You could tighten your butt cheeks, release them, tighten, and release again. This reduces tension throughout the body"

Okay, alone I sit, I see my phone is lit
But if I pick it up, up in my gut, I'll throw a fit
Why am I a ho and shit? Scared to say "hello" and spit
Am I becoming a bitch?
Chilling with my boys I know I belong, and I'm loving it
I really feel this chick, I can't believe she let me shove it in
This shit is great, out of one to ten, an eight, I'd summon it
Ain't got one complaint to pitch
But who the fuck am I kiddin'? I couldn't breathe the other night
I don't recall just what I feared but do recall the feel of fright
Every organ in my body pussied out and shriveled tight
I died tonight, my mind's in a maniacal fight
And soon the fear of having one
Would lead to having one while my sanity ain't having none
But then I had to laugh because my brain is rabid, man, I'm done
I'm so bad I'm grabbing my gun

Don't go overboard, 'cause you know the world is crazy
Fuck going overboard, it takes everything you got
Never go overboard, you know the fucking world is crazy
Fuck going overboard, no it don't take a lot to make a brain pop
I'm slappy, mad happy
Crash land, God damn it, I'm having a fucking panic attack
In a world of human wreckage
Coroding, imploding
So much phony shit, I'm having a fucking panic attack
In a world of human wreckage

"Since you understand what's actually what's happening in your brain when you have a panic attack, I'm sure you feel better equipped to handle one, next time one occurs. However, when your body is flushed with absolute horror, it doesn't matter what you understand. Nothing relieves it. Nothing releases you from its clutch. Eventually, your fear of having a panic attack can actually cause you to have a panic attack."

Alright, I fucking think I'm sick, what the fuck? This shit's a trip
Jimmy did a double shift? Well Jimmy's getting double chipped
Jimmy's got a troubled hip? Well Jimmy needs to fucking dip
Why must I inflict conflict?
Bored in the evening, just watching television
All the sudden all around my neck feel an incision
All emotions I had died in a fatal collision
Is this intermission or the decision? What the fuck is this?

Don't go overboard, 'cause you know the world is crazy
Fuck going overboard, it takes everything you got
Never go overboard, you know the fucking world is crazy
Fuck going overboard, no it don't take a lot to make a brain pop
I'm slappy, mad happy
Crash land, God damn it, I'm having a fucking panic attack
In a world of human wreckage
I'm maxing, relaxing
Tell me why am I having a fucking panic attack?
In a world of human wreckage
I'm slappy, mad happy
Crash land, God damn it, I'm having a fucking panic attack
In a world of human wreckage
Coroding, imploding
So much phony shit I'm having a fucking panic attack
In a world of human wreckage

Fuck you, fuck me, fuck us
Fuck Tom, fuck Mary, fuck Gus
Fuck the west coast, and fuck everybody on the east
Eat shit and die, or fuck off at least
Fuck pre-schoolers, fuck rulers
Kings and queens and gold jewelers, fuck wine coolers
Fuck chickens, fuck ducks
Everybody in your crew sucks, punk mother fucks
If I only could I'd set the world on fire
Say fuck the world
If I only could I'd set the world on fire
Fuck em all