Run Away Jay

(album: Dear Lemon House, You Ruined Me: Senior Year - 2021)

Sanguine giving me advice over drinks over and over again
And it just kept going straight right over and over my head
And I would try to lie and hide to get over and over on them
Why would you lie to your friend?
I can't make everyone and myself happy
I'm so fucking over it

No mentions of where I am or where I'm going
Or who I'm seeing or how I'm feeling

This isn't the last part, it's just the next
And what comes next is the ultimatum:
Do I choose my love or my friend that hates them?

Don't @ me, and don't tag me
I don't wanna listen to your complaining
You run your fingers like you run your mouth
Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up

Who's right, who's wrong?

And just when I think things can't get any worse, they always fucking do
I fucking hate you. You ruined my life. I just want my iPod back
Things can't get worse
I'm calm, it's fine, it's okay, it's okay

Here comes my father
Hot and bothered and full of lager
I'm not your daughter
Every single piano, every man in my life

Music to my ears to hear you shake your spear at me
About religion, sex and politics you don't know shit about
And how the color of my skin means I can't be depressed
The black boy better grab on to those boot straps

The dry, wry encouragement of roll up your sleeves and pick yourself up
Gets exaggerated and emphasized when they're used to fix my mental health

I'm not a leaky faucet or a loose screw
I'm an inch away from you
Face to face and we still can't see eye to eye

Now I'm on the bathroom floor with a chair to the door
The only thing keeping you from killing me

Banging. Screaming
Gary Barbera commercials on the TV
My father did it to me, that's just how I was raised
My mother did it to me, that's just how I was raised
Abuse is always disguised as that's how I was raised

Well... what are you, gay? No, I just don't like sports
Well... what are you, stupid? No, I just don't understand math
Well... what are you, weak? No, I just don't want to fight
What is wrong with you? I don't know, I need you to help me