My Loved Ones

(album: Da Fat Rat Wit Da Cheeze - 2001)

[talking]
For everyone I ever hurt, for everyone
That ever gave a damn about me
This ones for you, I apologize

[Billy Cook: singing in background]

[Lil' O: x2]
How could I be a fool [x3]
My loved ones

[Lil' O]
You say I'd go to jail, knowing everyday's like this
Asking why you a thug, you wasn't raised like this
You always told me go to school, and behave your best
Instead I broke your heart, sold dope and gave you stress
But everytime I got caught up, you was there for me
And everytime I went to jail, you shed tears for me
I never told you that I loved you, and you dared to me
Cause as a child I never knew, how much you cared for me
Remember running from the laws, I had to swallow that crack
And my heart stop beating, and my lungs collapsed
The doctor told you come see me, cause he doubt I'll come back
But you said you couldn't stand to see your son like that
On life support and a coma, handcuffs on my feet
So instead you sent my uncle to be checking on me
How'd I make it, probably all the prayers to God on your knees
And I apologize there for your grief, can you forgive me

[Chorus x2]
How could I be a fool
Not knowing when I hurt myself, I also hurt you
For that I was a bastard, I was selfish I was cruel
I hope you can forgive me for the pain I put you though, my loved ones

[Lil' O]
My Auntie came to see her nephew
She said I love you, but you know I gots to check you
The way you act is a disgrace, and disrespectful
But still you blood, so I pray the Lord protect you
Cause I know that you done got yourself in drama, and you going to war
Don't even lie to me, I seen the bullet holes in your car
Your daddy told me, that he found a gat up under your drawer
Know if you live by the gun, you gon die by the sword
I know that sense a child, you not evil
So what's this, that I'm hearing you done shot people
Don't let society justify, we not equal
Running round here like a demon, wondering God keep you
Cause the route that you going down baby, if you keep this up
The devil gon snatch your life, and come eat you up
Fight the demons, don't let these streets sweep you up
And cause of you getting sleep is rough, and that ain't fair

[Chorus x2]

[Lil' O]
If you was still alive, I wonder what you'd say to me
You'd probably slap my face, and tell me you ashamed of me
How did your child become the beast, that I became to be
But I ain't blaming you, the blame's on me
Cause my mama always bust her ass, making sure that her kid's had
But I always had to keep up with the latest new fad
I had more than most kids, but I still wasn't glad
And when I found out like dope, it's like my mind went bad
It was the G's, the rush, my greed, my lust
If you wouldn't get me something, I go get it like what
A 15 year old boy, wanting money like a grown up
Before I knew, I had the block sown up, I'm blowing up
Having street fame, thinking this what life is about
Bringing drama home, so daddy kicked me out of the house
Because of you he asked me back, I told him no what to shout
I'm having money, my own crib and I'm loving this route

[Chorus x2]

My loved ones, how could I be a fool [x20]