Anxiety

(album: Taking Up Space - 2020)

Holding in my heart
It's beating like it's coming through my chest
Panicking again I just can't seem to catch my fucking breath
Count to 10 but nothing's changing
Thoughts are raging in my head
Every time I swear this is the last time I'll get out of bed
But you said I was on my own
I've never quite felt so alone
But this anxiety inside of me keeps pushing me ahead
Medication all I need
It's just as bad as the disease
When I abide by my prescriptions
I keep wishing I was dead

You are my hate
You follow me
My only strength, why can't you see?
You're my best friend
My worst enemy
I can't live without you
But with you, I can't breathe

You're breaking up, I barely hear you through the static on your phone
I'll be fine, I just need time to heal so please leave me alone
Panicking again that anything you say might not be real
That you never loved me
You just loved the way I made you feel
But you said I was someone else
You hate the way I hate myself
But this anxiety inside of me, it keeps me up at night
You want me and I want more
I jump and wash up on the shore
Now I've chosen
I'm broken from my whole fucking life

You are my hate
You follow me
My only strength, why can't you see?
You're my best friend
My worst enemy
I can't live without you
But with you I can't breathe

Your God doesn't love me
Your God doesn't love me
Your God doesn't love me
And I can't breathe