Well Being

(album: Pareidolia - 2018)

Feel it creep under my skin
Fingers start to twitch
The lonely pang of restlessness
When there's no one else around
Do I even make a sound?
Or am I just an echo
Fading from their consciousness?
Without the amniotic comfort
Of being wrapped in someone else
My mind is left to wander
Lowered further down the well

When meditation
Becomes suffocation
Where to go?
Throw myself into you

And I'm ashamed to admit it
But it's how I've come to be
My past keeps biting at my feet
I've refrained to ever bare it
It's not fair of me
To burden my own company
Oh Christ, it's so goddamn pathetic
How I only know myself
In the context of someone else
So tell everyone to exit
View me in a vacuum
Self-pity on a feedback loop

When meditation
Becomes suffocation
Where to go?
Throw myself further down the well
Where nobody can hear me yell
No soul to console
Just myself
Until the echo begins to swell
And rings pell mell
No, I can't bare to look
Into what I fear most
A face emerging
Churning doubt
Who will pull me out?