Feeling Myself Parody

[Nicki Minaj:]
Yo B
You ready to make a video that no one will ever see because your man won't put it on YouTube?

[Beyoncé:]
This video looks like a bunch of bad home movies
Can you believe I'm the same person who once made Single Ladies?
That vid had class, this vid is just ass
Thanks to Jay-Z
This keyboard loop sounds like it was made by a baby

[Nicki Minaj:]
This video's not posted on YouTube
If you wanna see you have to log on to Tidal and subscribe too,
How come we still at zero views?!

[Jay-Z:]
If fans will not pay for music
I'll force them to do it
By making this vid an exclusive

[Nicki Minaj:]
Dammit Jay-Z, are you that stupid?
Who would pay twenty bucks
Just to see me shake my fake butt?
I do that in every vid, who gives a fuck?
Dude, your plan sucks

[Jay-Z:]
Maybe, but it's just not fair
That music is stolen and file shared
I just don't understand why the fans don't care
About us poor pop star millionaires

[YouTube:]
Jay-Z why do you hate us so much?

[Jay-Z:]
You're my rivals!

[Spotify:]
But no one wants your shitty service

[Jay-Z:]
Don't you dare insult Tidal!

[YouTube:]
We are both free

[Spotify:]
You only have a month free trail

[YouTube:]
You're overpriced

[Spotify:]
Plus who the hell wants uncompressed files?

[Beyoncé:]
We're in a kiddy pool in this scene
But no one knows that 'cause no one has seen this video
No one's gonna pay twenty bucks for a video
Jay-Z, Tidal sucks

[Nicki Minaj:]
This song is weak
It's not unique
It's just another song 'bout how I'm a sex freak
It's clear that the title refers to masturbation
That's why I do this move, meant to be simulation
All my lyrics are the same
I just about getting laid
And have some guys say I take big dick well for having such a small frame
That drives my male fans insane
That includes Drake and Lil Wayne
That's why after they watch my vids in their boxers there's a wet stain (ew)

[Some guy:]
We've got bad news
Tidal is bankrupt
Kiss it bye-bye

[Jay-Z:]
How can that be?
I pushed it so hard

[Some guy:]
I'm sorry Jay-Z, nice try

[Jay-Z:]
I feel so bad
I lost all my cash
I'm gonna cry
I just need to see the one I love
My dear sweet wife