Cool Guy 4

(album: Stan And Judy's Kid - 1999)

[Sean on the phone with a call-girl.]

[SEAN:] What's your name, baby?

[GIRL #4:] Desiree.

[SEAN:] Ohh, what a nice name for a nice girl, such as your self.

[GIRL #4:] What's your name?

[Sean presses 'play' button on tape player]

[SEAN:] My name's Sean, I want to get it on.

[GIRL #4:] Ooh.

[SEAN:] You know what I'm talking about, honey, I want to drop some serious loving on you, mama.

[GIRL #4:] Oh Sean, you sound so strong, like you really know what you want.

[SEAN:] Yeah baby, I'm strong as a bear, I want to wrap my big arm around you...

[GIRL #4:] Oh my.

[SEAN:] You want to be spinning around for some more loving I got for you?

[GIRL #4:] That's sounds nice, sean.

[SEAN:] You know what else sounds nice, the sound of your clothes slidding off and hitting the floor. that's music to my ears.

[GIRL #4:] I'm already naked, how about you?

[SEAN:] Well, I'm half way there, baby, just let me slip out of these silky boxer shorts of mine.

[GIRL #4:] You must look good you stud, are you hard?

[SEAN:] Baby, my tally-whacker's all revved up and ready to go.

[GIRL #4:] ..."Tally-whacker"?

[SEAN:] No, no, no... I said the sweet-meat.

[GIRL #4:] Oh my god.

[SEAN:] What?

[GIRL #4: {To other call girl}] I just heard some fucking idiot call it a tally-whacker.

[Sean groans]

[CALL GIRL #2: {To Girl #4}] Your kidding?

[GIRL #4: {To other call girl}] And his sweet-meat.

[CALL GIRL #2: {To Girl #4}] That's so gross.

[she hangs up]

[SEAN:] No. She did not just fucking hang up on me for 4 dollars a fucking minute.

[hangs up]

what the fuck is happening

[weeping]

... I'm horny, goddamn it. Oh, shit. Fucking, this is so un-chill.