The Cure

(album: Forgive & Regret - 2020)

You're my sickness, and I'm your cure
Always thinking that you putting you first
Guilt's got us running back and forth
Your love is a blessing and curse
Seeing you this way is hard for me
I don't understand your way of live
But I know that you're a part of me
Still you gotta be apart from me
And I'm still searching for the cure

You expect me to be in your life without making a change, that's so insane
I expected you to be right here by my side every time I was going through pain
I was your cure, you were my disease
I was saving you when you were killing me
I feel so guilty, I wanna feel free
I feel so guilty, I wanna feel free
I put you first, you put me last
We all coulda died in that crash
You shoulda put down the pills and the liquor, I guess that that was just too much to ask
You lost everything to gain nothing
Now you the one I'm not trusting
And you the one you got stuck with
I said you the one you got stuck with
You had to miss all these moments
You said you loved us but you never showed us
Tell me why you never act like a grownup
That's why I'm never picking my phone up
You were my only, I was your option
Thinking bout you make me nauseous
All of times that you thought you were hiding shit from me
You didn't know that I was watching

You're my sickness, and I'm your cure
Always thinking that you putting you first
Guilt's got us running back and forth
Your love is a blessing and curse
Seeing you this way is hard for me
I don't understand your way of live
But I know that you're a part of me
Still you gotta be apart from me
And I'm still searching for the cure

Why do I fear having you in my life?
I am so sick of you changing your mind
I got so used to you wasting my time
Wonder how you haven't taken my life
Always random people that you living with
All the hatred that my heart's filling with
Grew up thinking you were different
You not innocent, nah
If I do not like you, do I hate myself?
We share the same blood right down to the cells
You didn't care that you put me through hell
You only cared about how you felt
Don't expect my love without respecting me
Tearing at my heart like you dissecting me
I coulda gave you the rest of me
But then I wouldn't have nothing that's left of me
Feel like you're dead to me, but you're still breathing
There's always drama, and you are the reason
You always think that you gotta compete with
All of the people around me I speak with
I used to love having you in my life
I used to love having you by my side
I wait for that call that's saying you died
But I had to wipe my own tears when I cried

You're my sickness, and I'm your cure
Always thinking that you putting you first
Guilt's got us running back and forth
Your love is a blessing and curse
Seeing you this way is hard for me
I don't understand your way of live
But I know that you're a part of me
Still you gotta be apart from me
And I'm still searching for the cure