Ghost

(album: Nevers Road - 2019)

Fuck it!

Another day, another night
Another fucking battle in my mind
A lot of love, a lot of hate
A lot who want to see me unwind
I feel alone, all alone
Now get your shit together is what I'm told
Been feeling low, super low
And they won't even care 'till I'm ghost

Used to dream of the top, had nightmares of the bottom
'Till I realized that the bottom is the top when forgotten
Pray I don't fall, like Autumn
When you feel more like a product than a person there's a problem

Been, feeling so low, I don't want no one to know
I just need something to cope
Leave me alone, told them all leave me alone
Then wonder where do they go
Been here before, push away people I love
Just so they never get close
End of my rope, I don't think anyone care
Maybe they will when I go

Maybe they'll talk about me on the internet
They never care only care when they benefit
Introvert honestly out of my element
Still I'm afraid of becoming irrelevant

Pay attention to the ones who don't clap when you win
If they lie to you once then they'll do it again
Knew the hurt would come back, I just didn't know when
And the night of the crash, I thought it was the end
All it takes is a moment to alter a life
And I thought about that for the rest of the night
Am I making a difference with things that I write
Just a human you don't know the demons I fight so

Another day, another night
Another fucking battle in my mind
A lot of love, a lot of hate
A lot who want to see me unwind
I feel alone, all alone
Now get your shit together is what I'm told
Been feeling low, super low
And they won't even care 'till I'm ghost

You say I'm the worst, they say I'm the best
But call me tonight when you get off of work
Got things on my chest
I've been feeling bad for the feelings I have
I know that I'm blessed
Been learning that money just isn't the cure
For feeling depressed, I know I digress

I've been a mess, honestly I've been a mess
Hate what I think in my head
Act like a friend, then when I need you the most
That's when you leave me on read
Have to pretend, always just have to pretend
Like I don't care what it said
Stuck in my head, plenty of things I could do
I just go lay In my bed

Damn

Don't really know why I'm feeling so low
Where do you go when there's nowhere to go
They talk and they talk and I know they don't know
What it's like when your heart becomes empty and cold

How do I know what's real when my mind questions all I know
How do I save myself from myself when I'm feeling low
How do I flip the page if I'm stuck reading what I've wrote
Why do I always drown in my thoughts, need to learn to float

Another day, another night
Another fucking battle in my mind
A lot of love, a lot of hate
A lot who want to see me unwind
I feel alone, all alone
Now get your shit together is what I'm told
Been feeling low, super low
And they won't even care 'till I'm ghost