If You Don't Like The Story Write Your Own

(album: If You Don't Like The Story Write Your Own - 2022)

Had to let go of who I thought I should be to find who I am
Don't mean the edited one for the 'Gram
But I mean the one who needs love, has fear and doubt
And only comes out around fam
See, I'm just a man, I bleed and it's red
Been trying to quiet the voice in my head
Too weak to repeat all the things that it says
You're destined to slip when you live on the edge
And I'm doing my best, but it's never enough
It's always, "Hey, when you gon' follow this up?"
I give 'em so much of myself, my art, my soul
There isn't much left in my cup
Not praying enough, don't know who to trust
Don't follow for follow, I follow my gut
There is no more room for discourse anymore
It's "I'm right and you're wrong, and agree or shut up"
What in the fuck? When will we learn?
Together we grow, and divided we burn
There's over seven billion of us on Earth
And here I am talking 'bout putting me first
And all of my hurt, like anyone cares
I have a tendency to overshare
Crazy to look at a sea full of people and still feel like there isn't anyone there
As everyone stares, I swear that I'm fine
Tears streaming outta both of my eyes
They love to see all this raw and real emotion
So they can upload it online
This story is mine, they took and rewrote it
They'll do anything for a click and they post it
But never with credit, my art has been lessened to trends
While people pretend like they own it
Okay, duly noted, things change in due time
Things that I wanted all losing their shine
Now all I want is to text or to talk to my dad
But know I'll never get a reply
And that weighs on my mind, not trying to harp
But I have to live with this hole in my heart
And maybe the only real way that I know how to cope is by losing myself in the art
I said things that were harsh and I never meant
I let discontent really mess with my head
So many things that I wish I had done and had said
Before I never saw him again
Time that I make amends and pull back the curtain
I barely was there, even when he was hurting
And I think of that, I think, "Damn, what a terrible son"
And I question myself as a person
A human still learning

Huh
Just a human still learning (Uh-uh)
Know I'll never be perfect
That's the only thing certain, yeah

Someone mentioned the music was saving their life, they relate to it so much it hurts
And I thought to myself, "I'm so glad I could help, but it's you who put in all the work"
So don't give me credit 'cause I'm just a human who loses himself in his words
I wonder if Steve ever thought that one day we'd be treating an app like a church
And hold up these content creators and athletes and artists as if they were gods
Until we decide they no longer have value, then they're thrown away and forgot
See, honestly, all that we are is a sum of our vices, our fears, and our flaws
And then at the end, we end up in a box and can't bring anything that we bought
All the things that we're not make us who we are
Nobody thought I would make it this far
Used to shoot for the sky 'til I realized that it had been proven that humans are made out of stars
I spill out my heart, it's all that I know
Never been good at just letting shit go
Do you know how it feels to sink all that you have in your craft and still feel like there's nothing to show?
This here is a poem, a letter, a song
I don't know where in the fuck I belong
There's nothing more lonely than being surrounded by people yet all of your people are wrong
I feel like a pawn, I feel like I'm trapped
There's people I miss I can never get back
But been learning that life's not about how much water we have
It's about how we look at the glass, that's a lot to unpack, yeah

Dan said "Jump on a track, give 'em all that you have," yeah
Ever since, I don't know what it's like to hold back, yeah
When the story's authentic, you don't need to act, yeah
Never needed to act, yeah
There's concepts I need to explore, and feelings I can't just ignore
Who cares what you do, who you doing it for?
Oh my, how the tables have turned since I used to serve food that I couldn't afford
Mom and Dad got divorced, Mom just got remarried
For most of my life thought commitment was scary
But now I don't know, some places you can't take a road
If you don't like the story, you should write your
Own