Badass

(album: Eating's Not Cheating - 2004)

I never carry a gun I just carry my tongue
When it's not knee deep in pork it's acidic and forked
I'd mission abort don't need no permission to start
Rip apart every synapse and spark till you're clutching your heart
Playing Mario Kart with Wesley Clark
Make like Corey Heart and wear my shades when it's dark
Don't retort or remark get Dizzy G Cheeks
With a mouth full of fart [fart noise]

I'm Slaughter comma Sarge AKA Commissar
Balling like staling from USSR
shit's so fluid so far thanks to Matt on guitar
Yo DJ, take 'em to the part where I turn rap into art
Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah
Motherfucker check this shit out
I'm a bad ass I ain't gonna fucking spell it
I get up on the mic and then I fucking yell it
No need to embellish I'm selfishly hellish
Equatorial insect repellent
The like's of which you never dealt with motherfucker

YEAH MOTHER FUCKER! You think I'm fucking kidding? Fuck all you dicks that were giving me shit! Screw you! Especially my three older brothers, I'm never gonna forgive you guys for giving me all them noogies, and wedgies! Fuck that shit, that shit wasn't cool! And all those guys in junior high who were making fun of me cause I got caught masturbating at that birthday party. fuck you guys! You guys are fucking assholes, I hope you get cancer of the dick! And everybody in high school that made fun of me because I was too asthmatic to play ultimate Frisbee and I had to sit on the bench the whole time and read fucking books about Narnia. FUCK YOU GUYS! And all those colleges that didn't accept me, my parents got me a tutor so I'll see you bitches next year! WORD! I'm OUT!