C-3PO

(album: #mcchrisisgoodmusic - 2018)

I am 3PO
C-3PO
I am 3PO
C-3PO

Walk into the room, I can presume you can see my gold
Partner is an astromech, my best friend and my bro
Several different masters, make disasters, get sold
Bloke liked to choke, made me pro, broke the mold
I speak every single speech in the far reaches of the galaxy
I'm pretty much a slave because I never see a salary
Passed off as a present or we're purchased like we're property
Bigots put detectors every vector, it don't bother me
Sometimes I'm on a mission and I'm wishing we could backtrack
Sometimes a limb is missing or I'm in Chewbacca's backpack
Can be a little whiny, have you seen my shiney hiney?
Joints are always frozen, always holding, you can try me
I can get a little grimey, really do not like the dunes
Want to take a bath until my robot hands are pruned
Then we'll chase after my homey who is suddenly seeking Obi
Never tells me anything, I talk too much he told me

His name is C-3PO
Protocol droid with the mean flow
When he starts going, then he don't slow
God in a pod, got your squad low
His name is C-3PO
Protocol droid with the mean flo-flo-flo-flow
When he starts going, then he don't slow
God in a pod, got your squad low

Bitch asked if I spoke Bachi. You got me, JK, yes
You act like you don't like me, be polite or kiss my ass
Moisture farmer is a hater, evaporators is my shit
Curmudgeon begrudgingly submits to my divine mind tricks
Now I'm with some blonde brat, he's a map to Kenobi
Someday we'll need a map to drag his ass back to his homies
Told his groupies go blow me, rather milk my jabroni
He turned out like his papi, at least that Chacci had a Joanie
He's binocking on some Banthas, we need answers and my android
Tusken Raiders on a rampage, take advantage like they fanboys
Then some joke in a cloak made these sandies wet their panties
The sound they be switching in special editions sadly
Got invited to his hideout, no wonder he's a hermit
Atrocious decorating, I ain't hating, just observing
Can we go back to Antilles, really sorry for the sour sound
I've been powered down for an hour now. Any flowers found?
Speaking of getting burnt, Beru and Owen are certainly smoking
Time to find a ship and split before the enemy's awoken
Into a bar we can not walk in so we chill right by his speeder
Soon we're running to a Falcon, I need talcum on my peter

His name is C-3PO
Protocol droid with the mean flow
When he starts going, then he don't slow
God in a pod, got your squad low
His name is C-3PO
Protocol droid with the mean flo-flo-flo-flow
When he starts going, then he don't slow
God in a pod, got your squad low

Now there's pirates in our party and I'm hoping that they're nice
There's a presence that is sentient, it's friendliest in flight
She sniggers at his trigger happy flyboy and his dice
She speaks of revolution, a solution with a price
I keep telling him the likelihood of living because fuck 'em
Let's go back to Yavin, let me plug in, get a fuck in
There's a protocol imperative imbedded in my heritage
Now we're getting sucked in like it's a satisfying narrative
It's no moon, a space station, it's a true innovation
It's a reason for vacation. Where's the pod in this space ship?
The charmer steals some armor and the farmer found his twin
That part they didn't wipe, this isn't right, they live in sin!
I'm crushed 'cause they're crushed then I realize that I saved them
Obi-Wan turns to dust, we put pedal to the pavement
Or the equivalent. Danger imminent, this predicament ain't over yet
Tell my astromech to switch my neck when we can have secretive sex

His name is C-3PO
Protocol droid with the mean flow
When he starts going, then he don't slow
God in a pod, got your squad low
His name is C-3PO
Protocol droid with the mean flow
When he starts going, then he don't slow
God in a pod, got your squad low