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Adam Sandler

Balls

 

Balls

(album: 100% Fresh - 2019)


The guys over 50 know what I'm talking about. The testicles do get bigger and bigger as you get older. They hang lower and whatever the fuck happens... You know, you've seen it at the YMCA your whole life, the older men with the giant balls, and you're always wondering why they're so free and happy, fucking... Those are like the 85-year-old guys. They don't give a fuck. They just swing it... and whatever. They don't even think of throwing a towel on. They're just like, "This is it. I only got a few years left. I want... You should remember me how I am, with these giant..." My balls are not that big, but they still don't make sense on my body. My dick literally looks like it's sitting in a bean bag chair. Yeah, it's so comfortable. My dick never... it never wants to leave the balls. It's always just resting. So nice, like, "I love you guys. You're my best friends." [laughter] The new giant balls get me into trouble with my wife now, because we're both not used to them. I'm behind her doing my thing, what you do when you're behind your wife. And I'll hear, "Hey, hey, no spanking." I'm like, "That wasn't me. That was... That was those guys, babe." And she's like, "Oh... Oh, you got me again."

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