Funky Grass Band

(album: Porter - 1977)

A small town in Kentucky that's called Hazzard
Has been known to lay some talent on this land
Gave birth to a group that's really happening Eli Stubbs and his Funky Grass Band
The Funky Grass Band hits the stage a grinning their picking really turns a body on
Now I wouldn't say the band makes too much money
'Cause they been seen a smoking roll-you-home

Yellow bus come reeling down the highway
Heading for another one night stand
With the women screeming faint throw their babies
At Eli Stubbs and his Funky Grass Band

Now Eli's a little older and short and stubby and he's bald as an eagle in the back
But he kept it hid from all the friends and neighbors
The one night the band got high and smoked his hat
Now Eli bought himself a brand new toupet
It was long and shaggy and sorta orangey red
One night the fiddle player was a dancing to the microphone
And pulled the rug clean off of Eli's head

Yellow bus come reeling down the highway
Heading for another one night stand
With the women screeming faint throw their babies
At Eli Stubbs and his Funky Grass Band

One night they was a traveling through the Ozarks and Eli had to answer nature's call
He told the driver to find a filling station I gotta see a man about a dog
He drove on for miles around the mountain Eli hollered hey stop right here
Driver pulled too close to the canyon and Eli almost ended his career

Yellow bus come reeling down the highway
Heading for another one night stand
With the women screeming faint throw their babies
At Eli Stubbs and his Funky Grass Band

Oh, get it Eli, son, crank it, crank it, crank it Eli...