Barbeque

(album: 20 Comedy Hits - 1995)

There was a fellow named Attila the Hun
A bad news dude, he was strictly no fun
Yeah, he burned down every town from Rome to Kathmandu
Till someone finally said "Hey man, what's wrong with you?"

He said, "There's something that I'm looking for,
Something I just can't get enough of anymore"

I want some barbeque, some barbeque
And when I want it nothing else will do
Woke up this morning at a quarter to two
Just had to have some barbeque

I'm gonna pillage gonna plunder gonna throw myself a fit
Till I get a lil' something for my hickory pit
Bring me some coleslaw, French fries, a pickle or two
And a big ol' mess of barbeque (barbeque!)
I want a big ol' mess of barbeque!

Lord, have mercy!

Well now if you come from Kansas City (Kansas City!)
Alabama or that Georgia state
Tennessee or Carolina, honey, I don't ever mind
Just as long as you pile them high on my plate

I need some barbeque, barbeque
And when I want it nothing else will do
Woke up in a cold sweat at a quarter to two
Rolled over, said "Honey, I gotta have some barbeque!"

Now you can slice it, you can chop it, you can gnaw it off the rib
At a time like this, Lord have mercy, put 'em in gear
For some coleslaw, French fries, a pickle or two
And a big ol' mess of barbeque (barbeque!)
I want a big ol' mess of barbeque!

I want some barbeque, barbeque
Oh and when I want it, ain't nothing else gonna do
I woke up this morning at a quarter to two
And I, I rolled over, and I said:
Baby, honey, if you love me
You slip on that old chenille house coat
And them fluffy slippers
And slide on down to shorty's all-night hog heaven
And bring me back about five bags of inside lean
Yeah, I want that sauce dribbling off your elbow
Oh honey, I gotta have it!
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-barbeque!
I need it! I'm going into a coma here!
I'm fainting fast!
Ooowwww honey, oww...!