Thoughts

(album: Self Portrait - 2019)

Thoughts
Sometimes I just can't control my thoughts
No medication's ever made them stop
All I think about is everything I'm not
Instead of everything I've got

'Cause I'm scared they're all laughing
So I make the joke first
If I beat 'em to the punchline
Then I can't get hurt
Yeah, I swear to God I'm trying
But I don't know how to be
How to be a good friend to me

'Cause sometimes I just feel like I'm a freak
When I wake up, I just don't like what I see
All the way from my head right down to my feet
Wish that I felt differently

But I'm scared they're all laughing
So I make the joke first
If I beat 'em to the punchline
Then I can't get hurt
Yeah, I swear to God I'm trying
But I don't know how to be
How to be a good friend to me

Change
Wonder if I'll ever really change

'Cause I'm scared they're all laughing
So I make the joke first
If I beat 'em to the punchline
Then I can't get hurt
Yeah, I swear to God I'm trying
But I don't know how to be
How to be a good friend to

The voice inside my head that's telling me I'm okay
Entertain it for a second, then I push it away
Yeah, I swear to God I'm trying
But I don't know how to be
How to be a good friend to me

Thoughts
Sometimes I just can't control my thoughts