That's What Girls Are For

(album: Balls Out - 2011)

I wanna make one thing crystal clear
When I want an ice old beer
Get it real quick and say "yes, dear"
Those are the words that I wanna hear
We'll get along you will see
Focus on taking care of me
You gotta make me a priority
Cuz I'm a pretty bitching commodity
Dear old dad, now he's dead
But when he was alive he always said
"Make those bitches take care of you
Cause that's what women were born to do!"

That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for!
Cleaning, baking, hot love making
That's what girls are for!
That's what girls are for!
Taking directions, giving me erections

Do my laundry, pay my bills
Crush my Oxycontin pills
Clean the sheets where my manjuice spills
On the weekend you can roto-till
You'll see it's a way of life
Do a good job and you can be my wife!
Load my guns and sharpen my knife
Just kidding you ain't gonna be my wife!
Dear old dad, God rest his soul
He'd wake up in the morning and smoke a bowl
Smack my mom upside the head
"Make me a sandwich" is what he said
Yeah

That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
Sewing, cooking, being good looking
That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
Love me, rub me, suck my nubby!

Anyone can see, when you're waiting on me
Nothing makes me feel more alive!
And I pray everyday that somehow we can stay stuck in 1955!

That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
Sing it with feeling!
That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
Even my mom agrees!
That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for

That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
Wearing high heels and copping some feels
That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
Kissing licking tastes like chicken!
That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
Being real dumb, and making me cum!
That's what girls are for
That's what girls are for
S My D and L my B's some more!