I'm Alive, But I'm Not Here

In my bed in LA
I've had way better days
It's 2am and I'm awake
I miss feeling feelings if you feel me
I don't know if I'm sad
But I miss what we had
It feels good to be bad
So I text someone new instead of you
I'm sorry it's the truth
I've lost my morals
I've slept with more girls than I can count
I hate the whole world but pray I won't be hellward bound
I lost you but never found myself again
My mom says that I'm selfish and she's right
So here I am without a friend 'cus I pushed them away to write
That..

I'm alive, but I'm not here
I'm sick of trying without a cure
My eyes are dry but I feel tears
Because losing time is my only fear

In my car in NY
Living just to get by
Traffic sucks but I drive
It gives me time to think more
I don't know if life's pure
I don't believe what I hear
I don't play for the cheers
But the world thinks that's what I sing for
This world ain't a source. We've drained it all
We have nothing left but big holes and heads
The water's brown and your daughters down on me now in bed
It really ain't the best. I'll take what I can get
I'm pacing back and forth like I'm race
"Ready? Set.. Go"
Let go and fall in the pit
We're all gonna die. We're all not gonna live
But...

I'm alive, but I'm not here
I'm sick of trying without a cure
My eyes are dry but I feel tears
Because losing time is my only fear