His Status Is... Preferred

(album: Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (Season 1 - Volume 1) - 2016)

[Paula:]
He's discerning, he's refined
Eats French cheeses, drinks French wine
He travels all the time
And at the airport, cuts the line
And when he checks his leather luggage
No extra charges are incurred
'Cause he's elite
He's Silver Elite
Executive Silver Elite
His status is... Preferred

Fine hotels are where he stays
The kind with grand breakfast buffets
And a chef who can make omelettes a variety of ways
And they don't stick him in some regular room
No, that would be absurd!

He gets a suite
A two-room Executive Suite
An Executive City View Suite
With a second TV and 400 thread count sheets
Because his status is... Preferred

Oh, can't you see
He's got Premiere Access to me
My whole life, I've been stuck in Economy
I have waited and waited
To one day be upgraded
To spread my wings and fly
Just a bit more frequently!

On his wrist, a gold wristwatch
On his lips, a blended Scotch
And I have to stop my eyes from drifting
Downwards towards his crotch!
I can peek, but I have to be discreet
'Cause he's filet mignon
Not just some piece of meat

He's sophisticated
Elegant
Elite
In a word:
He's preferred