Big Chain Records (Skit)

(album: Golden Grain - 2002)

[Ludacris (MC Medallian) whispers:] Man, I cant believe this.. Whole family bout to get kicked out on the streets. I aint got no money, God. Man its gonna get worse.

[Lady at Big Chain Records (LaChainya):] Good Morning, Big Chain Records this is LaChainya speaking. How may I help you?

[Ludacris:] Uh yeah.. um.. I seem to be having a couple problems (whoa whoa) wit my contract.

[LaChainya:] We have a chain of commands here. Sounds like you need to speak to the head chain in charge. Hold please.

[MUSIC:] BIG CHAIN RECORDS. BIG CHAIN. BIG CHAIN RECORDS. BIG CHAIN.

[Big Chainy:] Big Chainy!

[Ludacris:] Hey Mr. Chainy

[Big Chainy:] Hey hold for a sec., (whispers) yeah i need 30 chains down in New Oreleans. Go 'head

[Ludacris:] yeah, um... its MC Medallian here...

[Big Chainy:] Medallian, how ya doin, brotha?

[Ludacris:] Hey can I come up and see you? 'Cause I'm having a couple....

[Big Chainy:] sure, sure, man, I love new talent.

[Luda:] Aight

[Big Chainy:] Hey Medallian how ya doin'?

[Luda:] Whats goin on...

[Big Chainy:] Thats a pretty little chain you got there (I know, I know)

[Luda:] Um... I was having a couple problems here because I was looking over my contract and I seem to be having a some issues. It states here that I'm supposed to get my advance when I signed the contract and I still havent gotten my advance and I dont know whats going on.

[Big Chainy:] Oh.... okay... I see where that could be a problem. ([Luda:] right) What I don't think you understand is that what we're gonna do is give you a really big ass chain, just a big ASS chain ([background:] big ass chain)

[Luda:] Okay. Big Chain. Okay, okay I understand that but it says here that I'm supposed to get some monitary value. I-I dont have any money, I-I need money...

[Big Chainy:] I could see where the confusing would come in at. What I don't think you understand is that we're gonna give you a really BIG ASS chain, a big ([luda:] right), platnium big ass chain an-annd on the back end we're gonna give you some big ass earrings.

[Luda:] okay look, I understand about the chain man, my family's about to get kicked out on the street ([big chainy:] oh that's terrible) I mean, I have no money whatsoever. I need money..

[Big Chainy:] you know what? I don't usually do this, okay... I don't usually do this but but since you dont believe. Jake, bring out the chain! ([backround:] QUE THE CHAIN!) ([backround:] AHHH! Damn thats a big ass chain!) that is a big ass chain...

[Luda:] oh God. I, I guess I didn't realize how big ths chain was ([Big Chainy:] yeah, it's, it's not a problem) I'm sorry, jus-just forget about what I was talkin about...

[Big Chainy:] Not a problem... Big Chain Records is takin off, we're expanding. (right, right) We're getting bigger and better (right). You know what, chains can be loose? much bigger. Pretty soon we're gonna have a whole chain of big ass chains ([luda:] alright. BIG CHAIN RECORDS!