Replacing Leene's Bell

(album: Lessons That We Swear To Keep - 2023)

The uncertainty that's filling the room
Is heavy on my lungs
I taste it on the tip of my tongue
It's unfair that you were left to assume
That I was checked out, packed up, and waiting for my chance to run

If I am being honest
That could never be the truth
So upset that I had failed to notice all the signs
You felt despondent
Left alone without a clue
How to crack the combination of a fucked up mind

After all of times that I barely replied
To all the things you were excited about
I let work fill my mind
And lost sight of the time
And told myself that I would text tomorrow
And then I never did
Caught up in work again
There is no reason that I shouldn't have set it aside
Now it's so evident
It was just selfishness
You deserve to feel appreciated

And while I'm being honest
I'm sure I'd feel the same
If we traded places and you left me out to dry
If you were unresponsive
I would feel so jaded too
You were absolutely right

It's my fault that I slid Into old habits
Shut myself off from the rest of the world
Should have welcomed you in and gave you precedence
I was convinced that you'd feel overwhelmed

I'm still learning how to be an open book when I'm down
I just want you to know, I understand if you go
I'd give up all I own, just to see you happy

I know that we have talked and worked it all out
But I can't help but hate how I almost dragged us both down
History is doomed to repeat
Unless mistakes turn into lessons that we swear to keep
And never lose

I'd give it all just to rid
You of your sadness
To keep us both in sync with the world
Swear to welcome you in and give you precedence
In fact I'd trust you to take over the helm

I have learned now how to be an open book when I'm down
I just want you to know, no matter how this goes
I'd give up everything
Just to make you happy

Who says that we can't be happy?