Overdose

(album: Self Medicated - 2020)

[Jelly Roll:]
Every day's harder, been trying to change
But lately I really been feeling the urge
Dealing with demons, been hearing 'em speaking
And popping this shit just to deal with the nerves
And I don't know who I am anymore
Feel like the past is knocking at my door
Bound by these chains, my old habits won't let go of me
I'm somewhere between the man I was and who I wanna be
Struggle with recovery, tryna find inner peace
Tryna find a way to quit my need to feed the inner beast
And my back's against the wall
And I could lose it all
There's a freedom that's involved
Every time I fall

Hopeless
Why do I always feel so hopeless?
I say I love it, but it's really 'cause I need it
This addiction I keep feeding
I can't have this feeling
I know I'ma need a freedom
But I'm hopeless
Why do I always feel so hopeless?
I fucking hate it but I feel like I can't beat it
I could fly away this evening
But I don't wanna overdose

[Still Matthews:]
Now it's four in the morning and I'm up here feeling lonely
Inside this fucking head of mine and you don't even know me
I'm over you, but I ain't over you
Wake me up, I've been dreaming
In and out of love, I'm leaning
Feeling like a fucking pea praying
A relapse just might heal me
I'm overdue, being over you
How could you love me? How can you hate me?
How come I don't give a fuck?
Black ink on me Bup is in me
And I got one hell of a buzz
High as a fuck, light that all up
Substance are fighting in us
Put it on you, put it on me
I'm all in, calling your bluff

[Jelly Roll:]
Hopeless
Why do I always feel so hopeless?
I say I love it, but it's really 'cause I need it
This addiction I keep feeding
I can't have this feeling
I know I'ma need a freedom
But I'm hopeless
Why do I always feel so hopeless?
I fucking hate it but I feel like I can't beat it
I could fly away this evening
But I don't wanna overdose