Why Not Me?

[Thor:]
Why not me?
Do I not deserve a nomination?
The reviews were raves to be sure
"Fun for the whole family
Look no farther than Thor"

[Wonder Woman:]
Why not me?
I left my family to fight for what's right
Saved the world from hte devil below
But I'm sure it was hard for
Sir Daniel Day Lewis to to learn how to sow

[Thor/Wonder Woman:]
Why not me?
[Thor:]
I battle Cate Blanchett
[Thor/Wonder Woman:]
Why not me?
[Wonder Woman:]
I hid a sword in my dress
[Thor/Wonder Woman:]
We both faced death it's true
But at least Lady Bird got into NYU

[Pennywise:]
Why not me?
In All The Money in the World
They kidnapped one kid
And they got a nomination
I killed hundreds
I guess that's what you get
When you're not
"Classically handsome"
Oscars so white
But I guess not for me
I need to raise my quote
So I can finally fix my teeth
Horror movies always get the shaft

[Tiffany Haddish:]
Hey... let me do one!
I peed while hanging from a zipline
Meryl Streep has never done that

[The 4 Chrises:]
We'd like to petition for
A new category:
"Best Chris"
Or you could just write "Chris"
On an Oscar
And we can chare it
Trade off on weekends
[Evans:]
Roll call!
[Hemsworth:]
Hemsworth!
[Pratt:]
Pratt!
[Evans:]
Evans!
[Pine:]
Pine!
[Chris Rock:]
Rock!
What? It's us! The Chrises!
[The 5 Chrises:]
Go Chris!

[Michael Fassbender:]
And why not The Snowman?
It was a box office smash
(What's that? It wasn't?)
Well Oscars doesn't care
Since it was critically acclaimed
(7% positive? Are you serious?)
Well I thought it was a neat idea

[Aquaman:]
In The Shape of Water
I heard that a lady boned a fishman
But if you're gonna bone a fishman
Why not bone a fish like this man?

[Dominic Toretto:]
And what even is art?
How do you define its importance?
If popcorn movies are bad
How come popcorn's so delicious?
And when I blow up 6 cars
How is that worse than Schindler's List is?

[All:]
Why not me?
[Thor/Wonder Woman:]
We saved the world
[All:]
Why not me?
[Dominic Toretto:]
I am Toretto
[All:]
Why not me?
[Aquaman:]
I heard a lady boned a fishman
[All:]
Why not me?
[Michael Fassbender:]
The Snowman was underrated!
[All:]
Why not me?
[The 5 Chrises:]
We'd like to petition for
A new category:
"Best Chris"
[Pennywise:]
I have terrible teeth
[All:]
Why not me?
[Thor:]
I got a cool new haircut
[All:]
Why not me?
[Baby Groot:]
I am Groot
[All:]
Why not us?