can't be my friend

Last night I thought I died
Woke up six feet beneath my bed
I opened up my eyes
My head on fire, can't pretend

I ain't been telling lies
I call you up to make amends
You say "don't even try"
You know I'll fuck it up again

I feel like I'm running underwater
Me against myself, I never win
And how come all my demons get along but
I can't be my friend?

So when my future calls
I keep my phone on silent
Act like it's not my fault
I blame it on Verizon

I keep romanticizing
All my toxic tendencies
If I can't be my own best friend
Then I'll be my worst enemy
Oh yeah

And I feel like I'm running underwater
Me against myself, I never win
And how come all my demons get along but
I can't be my friend?

I guess maybe karma finally caught up
Swear I know exactly how it ends
I know I'm the only one I got but
I can't be my friend