Nerves

I don't know where to turn...
You'd think by now I'd learn...

I don't know where to turn
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want something from you, but won't love you in return
It's been fucking with my nerves
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want something from you, but won't love you in return
It's been fucking with my nerves

Lifestyles of the rich and famous
I used to pray one day I'd make it
Then I did and it ain't been the same since
I've been tripping I've been going through phases
I look around and I don't see the same faces
Yeah I feel so close I can taste it
Impatient, wasted, anxious, I hate this

You ain't got a lot a kicking
So you should probably mind yo business
Staring at the clock when the time keeps ticking
The free throw line, nigga shot long distance
People say I'm narcissistic
The thing is I don't have to play the part I live this
I really had to make some hard decisions
And I won't ever do it if my hearts not in it

That's the shit that I'm used to though
Pedal to the metal 'til I lose control
All I'm tryin to do is improve and grow
Until I'm on stage at the super bowl
My backs still crawling with demons
Plug my ears and I try not to hear them
I don't even recognise the guy in the mirror
I ask myself like "Why am I Here?"

I don't know where to turn
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want something from you, but won't love you in return
It's been fucking with my nerves
You'd think by now I'd learn
Got blisters on my fingers from this money that I burn
But I don't show concern
I'll party 'til it hurts
They all want something from you, but won't love you in return
It's been fucking with my nerves

Sometimes I don't really want to know the truth
I'm just doing what I'm supposed to do
Never showing on the surface what I'm going through
Need a fresh start and it's overdue
Every single line isn't quotable
Gotta manifest it all or it won't come true
So let me get a toast to this ocean view

Who woulda thought that I'd be living like this
Now every single song is a hit I don't miss
Someone pass the toilet paper man I've been on my shit
I'm sick stay away from me, I'm still at high risk
You start to notice as the narrative changed
While they still sleeping on me, they barely awake
I got my city on my back, I gotta carry the weight
So if I'm ordering the steak, then I'm sharing my plate

And I don't really got time for the guys
Cuz I got these problems I'm trying to conquer
I do this for the people in line at my concerts
You're now witnessing the mind of a monster
So I can't pay attention to the fuckery
I was looking for something that was right there in front of me
Right now I'm trying to work on my recovery
But suddenly they all want to treat me like a somebody

What can I say man, the irony is real
I'm fully independent, I won't sign another deal
My eyes are running kill, and I'm firing at will
I'm the fireman everybody line up for the drill
I had a lot of issues I was trying to conceal
You aspired to be rich, I aspire to be real
I'm lucky 'cuz I still got desire in me still
And the drive's still there but the drive's uphill

I don't know where to turn...
You'd think by now I'd learn...
I don't know where to turn...
You'd think by now I'd learn...