Pibb Goes Surfing

(album: Shhh...Don't Tell - 2004)

You were cruisin along there, Mr. Pibb

It wasn't too painful a paddle out here to the big waves as you like to call em, Sonny!

Didn't look it

Actually, it was a nice wake-me-up for my laticerace muscles

Water's pretty nice, huh?

Boy, oh boy, the Hawaiin sea's like a warm cup of java!
Temperaturo perfecto as the Africans might say!

Yeah, yeah... So listen to me for a sec, when the set comes in, just stay flat on the board, pointed towards the beach. I'll tell you when to start paddelin, and keep paddelin til the wave grabs you

I hear ya! Let Mother Nature do her duty!

Right on...

Right now!

Yeah, right now...

Yeah!

Then when I say stand up, hop up quick like I showed ya and ride

Affirmative, captain!

But don't go too far right, there's a lot of nasty coral over there

Well here comes a triple overheader right now! Let me tear into that sucker!

I dunno, that's comin awfully steep, Pibb

No steeper than that tsunami I rode back in 1928 on my grandpappy's TV tray! Let's do this!

You're the boss, Pibb... Start paddelin, now!

Will do!

Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!

Paddle, paddle, fiddle faddle! I love it!

Okay, okay, you're in it, baby! Stand up! Stand up, Pibb!

I'm standin! I'm standin! Whoo hoo, I'm up!

Yeah, man! Way to go Pibb!

I'm speedin along here!

[different man] Hey, old man, you better pull out before you hit that reef!

Well, thanks, amigo, but I didn't come out here for no six second ride!

Bail out, Pibb!

Not until I get the tube! Aaaah!!!

[crashing and cracking noises]

[different man from before] Oh, nasty brudda!

Hang on, Pibb, I'll be right there! Oh my God, that was sick!
You okay, Mr. Pibb!?

Is there a doctor in the house? Oooooh!!!

[another wave hits, more cracking and crashing]