Dog Festival Directions

(album: Pink Season - 2017)

If you want to eat some dog
I have good news
There's an annual dog festival
Where you can eat all the dog you want
And it's located in Yulin Guangxi China
And the festival spans about ten days
With 15 thousand dogs consumed
And it goes from the 21st to the 30th of June
I just wanna let you know
I'm just tryna be a bro
So you first take a flight to Guangzhou China
Once you get off at that airport
You wanna ask around for the Guangxi provincial bus
And it costs 20 US dollars
And it's a four and a half hour ride
And you get off at Maoming West
Just remember Maoming West
Now you might have to stay there a full night
Depending on the time you arrive
Because the next bus that goes to Yulin only runs like once a day
And you have to buy another ticket
It's about another 22 bucks
But from there it goes straight to Yulin
Soon enough you'll be eating some dog
Now there are about 8 available hotels in Yulin
I'm checking online now
I suggest the Yulin Lijing International Hotel
Offering a sauna, fitness center
Wow it's not too bad at all
Nevermind, it's 50 bucks a night
But with free complementary breakfast
And a free cancelation fee
So it's not as bad as I thought
When you're ready the concierge will know exactly which festival you're talking about
And he or she will give you directions
So take a cab
But don't get ripped off
If you're white they'll charge you double
I shit you not
I shit you not
But anyways enjoy your flight
Goodbye
Enjoy the dog festival