Blow Up Plastic Girl (Hidden Track)

(album: Like It Used To Be - 2002)

Well I knew I had to have her so I sent off in the mail
I saw her picture in that magazine
And when the postman brought her, I thrilled as I blew up
The prettiest plastic girl you'd ever seen

I called the new girl Wendy and Wendy blew my mind
Figured that I'd keep her around
Her plug kept her inflated and when I had it in
But when I pulled it out she'd go down

[Chorus:]
She's a life sized, wife sized, full grown blow up plastic girl, nothin's missing
Yeah she never had a headache, she ain't got bad breath when we're kissing
Yeah she's there when you need her, she's more than just a friend
And her skin is as smooth as a pearl
She's a life sized, wife sized, full grown blow up plastic girl

Well I didn't tell nobody except my best friend Earl
You can't trust just anyone you see
When I'd come home late at night all tired from making pizzas
Wendy, she'd be waiting there for me

One night I came home anxious with Wendy on my mind
And it broke my heart in two when I walked in
And I found the one I'd always thought would always be just mine
Laying there with Earl my best friend

[Chorus]

I never dreamed that Wendy would be the cheating kind
I never figured Earl would let me down
But you don't know what can happen in these modern mixed up times
Cause there's a lot of wierdos running round