Twin Lakes

(album: Put A Crown On It - 2019)

I open my eyes up
There's somebody sleeping in the bed next to mine
But I don't recognize them
Couple nurses coming in the room to check on me
And maybe shed light
Tell me where I am
My legs are too long for this twin size bed
She said I need rest
Time to take my meds
It's gonna be a long thirty days ahead
I went for my phone
But it's gone
She said the staff searched everything I own
They confiscate my razor
My cologne
They made me sign a waiver
I can't call home
So now I'm praying to the light on the fire alarm
Thinking to myself "Look what I've become"?
The tears on my face taste like alcohol
I'm crawled up in a ball
Fighting my withdrawals

I was staring in the mirror
And the man I saw
Was appalled at the wrong I've done
And it's never been as clear as it is right now
I was powerless all life long
I'm ready for recovery
Trying on to break these chains
Ready for recovery
Trying to escape Twin Lakes

It's Six AM
And I don't got an appetite for breakfast
I can't make friends
Cause I don't think that I know who I am yet
I flick my cigarette ash
I'm scared of talking group
A girl across the room is saying how she got abused
Younger kids are laughing like it's funny
I am not amused
I need to mind my business
That's the type of attitude I'm trying to lose
Told my counselor
I think that I fell out of love of living
I drink Crown by the gallon jug
Not an ounce of fuck is giving
Buzz without the fun
Now I'm just a violent drunk
And If I don't want to get sober
Then it's all over
I just hope my higher power shows forgiveness
Victim of this drug abusive life I live
Lose my mind
And then another suicide attempt
So I turn my willing life over to you to drive again
I'm just hoping I got time to undo the wrong I did

I was staring in the mirror
And the man I saw
Was appalled at the wrong I've done
And it's never been as clear as it is right now
I was powerless all life long
I'm ready for recovery
Trying on to break these chains
Ready for recovery
Trying to escape Twin Lakes

It's never too late