My Fanny Pack

(album: Sexy Album - 2010)

Walking down the street and everybody's staring
Just jealous of what I'm wearing
That's right it's a fanny pack, bitches
Hot pink and matches my britches

You're thinking “that guy's insane
Damn, what's his name? What's wrong with his brain?”
I'm perfectly sane, just hear what I say
Everything I need's just one zip away

My fanny pack, my fanny pack is all I need
It's on my waist while I shower and while I pee
It holds my hairspray so I look good every day
It holds me tight and keeps the Boogie Man away

You can't mess with my fanny pack, I'm a maniac
It's a fact, you better watch your back
Packs more than a back pack
One time I looked inside and I found an iMac

Only tough guys wear fanny packs
Hulk Hogan, Chuck Norris and this guy…
Diss me and you better watch your back
I'll smack you with my 20 pound fanny pack

I've been attacked by a wild beast
I think it was a furry hippopotamus from Greece
I needed a weapon for the fight
What I pulled out was a stick of dynamite

Makes great gifts for the holidays
“It's my dick in a pack, babayyyy”
If you talk smack, I'll put you in my sack
What's this? It's midget in my fanny pack!