No Parody

[Meghan Trainor:]
Everything about this is no
This song is
No!
This vid is
No!
My dancing is
No!
Plus it looks and sounds old
Like something Britney Spears
Did 15 years ago

[Dancers:]
What's with your new look it's straight up no!

[Dancer 1:]
Your hair is
No!

[Dancer 2:]
Your clothes are
No!

[Dancer 3:]
Your makeup is
No!

[Dancer 2:]
Your stylist really blows

[Dancer 1:]
Did she pick out that coat?

[Dancer 3:]
You should let her go

[Dancers:]
You look like a leprechaun girl

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

I wanted to do
Something that was new
Change the way people thought about me
So I dyed my hair
Changed the clothes I wear
And learned some lame choreography
Then I discarded
The sound that made me big
Nineteen-fifties bubble gum doo-wop
For a sound
That straight rips off N'SYNC and Britney Spears style pop

There's a message in this song
It's a feminist anthem
And the message is any time a man talks to you say

[Janitor 1:]
Excuse me

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[Janitor 2:]
We're here to

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[Janitor 3:]
We need to clean

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[Janitor 1:]
We need to clean the floor!

[Janitor 2:]
We are the janitors!

[Janitor 3:]
I guess we should just start

[Meghan Trainor:]
Quit hitting on me jerks I said no!

[Janitor 1:]
We'll start here

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[Janitor 2:]
Be careful!

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[Janitor 3:]
The floor is wet!

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[Janitor 1:]
Miss Trainor

[Meghan Trainor:]
I said no!

[Janitor 2:]
But you're dancing too close!

[Janitor 3:]
You're going to slip

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!
Quit asking me out guys, I said no!

Every guy I see
Tries hitting on me
I'm sick of it that's why I'm mean to them

[Dancer 4:]
But that sounds arrogant!

[Meghan Trainor:]
No, you don't understand
The effect my body has on men
All these girls with me
Are totally skinny
Which is weird because my biggest song
Is about
Positive body image for overweight girls

[VP 1:]
Meghan, we're senior VP's

[VP 2:]
At your record company

[VP 3:]
We're concerned about this

[Meghan Trainor:]
No, stop trying to hit on me!

[VP 1:]
Now we think

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[VP 2:]
This song's too

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[VP 3:]
It's not a hit!

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[VP 1:]
You need to re-record

[VP 2:]
And maybe write some more

[VP 3:]
Songs like you did before

[Meghan Trainor:]
I'm not going out with you assholes!

[VP 1:]
I don't want

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[VP 2:]
I'm married!

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[VP 3:]
Meghan, I'm gay!

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!
Shut up, leave me alone!

[VP 1:]
But Meghan

[Meghan Trainor:]
I said no!
You're not taking me home!

[VP 2:]
What's wrong with her?

[VP 3:]
She's delusional!

[Meghan Trainor:]
All men are good for nothing
If you see one run and scream
Can someone help me open this jar, it's totally stuck?

[Meghan Trainor:]
No!

[Man:]
What?

[Meghan Trainor:]
Neh!!

[Man:]
Meghan, please

[Meghan Trainor:]
No! No!

[Man:]
I tried to help!

[Doctor:]
Results are back
From tests we ran
On your blood Meghan
And we have determined
You're actually a man

[Meghan Trainor:]
That can't be!

[Doctor:]
Yes it can!

[Meghan Trainor:]
If I'm a man then I must say no!

To my hands
No!
To my feet
No!
To my elbows
No!
To myself as a whole!

[Doctor:]
She is losing control!
She is gonna blow!

[Meghan Trainor:]
No n-n-no n-n-no no
N-argh!

[Doctor:]
Oh wait, my graph was upside-down. She actually was a woman. Sorry.
Sorry, Meghan. Oops.