My Anxiety

I find it hard to describe my anxiety
Feel like my heart and my mind got a rivalry
Feel like my thoughts and emotions are fighting inside of me
I gotta get this shit out of me
I feel like Forrest I'm running from everything
I never saw that shit in its entirety
If you need someone to get something
90% done and quit on it, you should just hire me
I'm feeling closer to death
I feel a hole in my chest
Feel like I'm stuck underwater
Feel like I'm holding my breath
Like it's the only one left
Nobody know I'm depressed
Even the people that know me the best
I call my momma, she told me to rest
I only get out of bed to get more cigarettes, yeah

I've been so close I can taste it
I've been so far I've been patient
I take a bar and get wasted
Part of my brain is erased when I go to Mars in a spaceship
Its written all on my face and no one relates
I don't know how long I can take it
You want a smile, I'ma fake it, copy and paste it
That''s an alright imitation, yeah

Is someone coming to save me?
I'm faded it don't even phase me
I've had a hater that's showing me love
And I've had a lover betray me
I've had a lot of lessons, still got a lot of questions
Still don't got any answers
Eat your veggies, pray for a lotta blessings
Die from like twenty cancers
That''s why I'm taking these drugs
That's why I'm up till the morning
Shot, after shot, after shot, I can't stop it I'm zoning
Shrugging like Jordan did playing against Portland
Still can't afford all the shit that I need
I get too anxious when I hit the weed
I take a pill and I'm feeling relieved
I take another, I triple the speed

I've been so close I can taste it
I've been so far I've been patient
I take a bar and get wasted
Part of my brain is erased when I go to Mars in a spaceship
Its written all on my face and no one relates
I don't know how long I can take it
You want a smile, I'ma fake it, copy and paste it
That''s an alright imitation, yeah

I'm looking happy online, but it's not what you think
I'm losing touch if I'm touching a screen
One minute I think I love everybody
And then I'm like "Fuck everything"
I'm looking happy online, but it's not what you think
I'm losing touch if I'm touching a screen
One minute I think I love everybody
And then I'm like "Fuck everything"
On a highway to hell, or a stairway to heaven
And I'm stuck in the middle, I can't make a decision
I don't think I'm suicidal, but if I was, I won't admit it
Like I'd be okay with dying if I'm not the one who did it

I've been so close I can taste it
I've been so far I've been patient
I take a bar and get wasted
Part of my brain is erased when I go to Mars in a spaceship
Its written all on my face and no one relates
I don't know how long I can take it
You want a smile, I'ma fake it, copy and paste it
That's an alright imitation, yeah